Well, it’s time the Portsmouth, Virginia chapter of HW represented again by bequeathing the masses with another review. I had originally started this review over six months ago, but I kept getting distracted for one reason or another. I originally thought that it was because I was really looking forward to this movie and it didn’t meet my expectations. I think it really came down to me being a procrastinating fucker. Anyway, let us begin.

The story is about a rockstar wannabe named Ace who is a real big fan of the band Guitar Wolf. He pretty much idolizes their lead singer (and guitarist) Guitar Wolf and tries to emulate him in every way possible. After a Guitar Wolf show, he stumbles onto an argument between Guitar Wolf and a shady club promoter. A melee ensues and guns are fired. After it is over, Guitar Wolf is impressed by Ace and gives him a whistle. Anytime Ace gets in trouble, he can blow on the whistle and Guitar Wolf will hone in on him and come to his rescue. This works with great effectiveness at least once in this movie.

Somewhere in the mix, UFO’s come into play. They somehow affect the dead and make zombies roam the earth, or at least in Japan. Throw in the Yakuza and some arms deals, a zombie love story, some pretty good Misfits style rockabilly japanese music (by the way, check out some of the lyrics to the Guitar Wolf songs in this movie. Simply awesome.), a moral or two, and you have the exact recipe for Japanese zombie chicanery!

The acting in this movie is quite good. Character development is also good and the characters are quite unique. You have the hot older asskicker female who is basically a mercenary and arms dealer. You have Tobio, Ace’s love pursuit, who tends to pass out in times of danger and also possesses a deep dark secret. You have the drug using shady promoter who has a bowl haircut and wears really high girly shorts. Then you have Guitar Wolf. These guys are some coolass cats. Guitar Wolf tends to kick all the ass, while Bass Wolf and Drum Wolf stand back and comb their hair in slow motion and drink a bunch of booze. Guitar Wolf also has a kick ass guitar that doubles as a sword. He has magical guitar picks that hone in and explode zombie’s heads on impact. When he is in trouble he will strum a couple chords and yell out “Rock n’ Roll!” Toss in a couple cool one-liners and you have a pretty cool fucker.

For those of you looking for some skin, you get a pretty good viewing of the militia chick’s rack in the shower, all the while she is kicking zombie ass. Lots of good gore in this movie. The zombie heads explode in a unique way. I can’t explain it, You will just have to see it. Lots of blood and guts. Good stuff. Pretty good violence also. Lots of big explosions and zombie carnage. In one surprising scene, young amicable Ace goes on this rage-induced bloody frenzy and single handedly kicks a large group of zombies equipped with only a crowbar. Every now and again he will stop and scream “Fuuuuuuuuckkk!!” How cool is that? The zombies look really good too. Great make up.

So here was my malady. This was a good movie. I had looked for it for several months, all the while reading excellent reviews and getting into a feverish frenzy. By the time I got it, there was no way in shit it was going to match my expectations, and when it didn’t it kind of bummed me out. I like to call this the Forrest Gump syndrome. Anyway, I have watched it a couple times since and have found it more enjoyable.

There are also some instances in the movie that are quite noisy (usually the ones with Guitar Wolf playing live). They are louder than the other parts of the movie and I have to put my ice-cold frothy beer down and physically get off of my lazy ass to adjust the volume, lest my two cats jump on my chest and claw my eyes out in defiant objection. Not sure if this is due to my inferior sound system or dvd quality. Probably both.

Overall, this is a good zombie flick. It is essentially a love story with 20,000 zombies thrown in. It looks like it had a pretty big budget. It was very cool and stylish. It was also very, very weird. It is not in the same league as Versus and Junk, but it is not far behind.

Reviewer Wolf gives this flick 6.5 out of 10 deep dark secrets that your girlfriend may possess. If she does, look the fuck out!

This review was fueled by Victory’s Old Horizontal barleywine (11%. Booyah!) and Soul Asylum. Sing it with me! “Fruuuustraaaated Incorporated!” I know…Old School. I am what I am.